Occupy... Colonial Heights?!

What started as a grassroots protest in New York City has expanded into a worldwide phenomenon. There have now been Occupy protests in nearly 1000 cities in over 80 countries. Wow, that's a lot of pissed off hippies! 

I would be a hypocrite if I didn't support the protesters. I'm part of that 99%. I work a thankless, low-paying job despite having a Bachelors degree. I'm broke and in debt and seriously concerned about my future. So why not side with the people with similar agendas? The thing I disagree with is this protest right here. Is this woman for real?

For those of you who don't know what Colonial Heights is, it's a town/small city about 30 minutes south of Richmond, Virginia. If you've ever driven through Central Virginia on I-95 heading to or from Richmond, you've probably passed through Colonial Heights. Don't worry, you didn't miss shit. There's a mall but that's about it. CH lacks racial diversity (hence the local moniker Colonial Whites), it's culturally bland, and all-around dull. I'd rather watch ice cubes melt in the Arctic tundra than to waste my day in CH. There's nothing important there! So why in the hell would you stage an Occupy protest there of all places?! Why not somewhere important like here?! Good old Phillip Morris has more money than God and they make products that kill people. 'Nuff said. 

So to the Occupy Colonial Heights people, I implore you, seek another venue. One that has purpose behind it. Where rednecks driving past in their huge trucks won't laugh at you and throw beer bottles out of their windows at you. Here's a list of alternative protest-friendly spots:

Honeywell (polluting the Tri-Cities area since God knows when)

Outside the Governor's Mansion (McDonnell sucks!)

the offices of PETA in Norfolk, VA (actually, they might show you a thing or two on how to protest properly!)

the Virginia Historical Society (because they don't hire archivists with only a B.A. in History. Bastards!)

Einstein Bagels (they don't stay open long enough)

any club or bar in Shockoe Bottom in Richmond (I still feel dirty from the pub crawl I did there over 5 years ago!)

any major bank or mortgage company that's located in this area (that's just common sense. this IS all their fault!)

Here, here, or HERE! (in case you're afraid to click those links that's the Virginia General Assembly, office of the Democratic Party of VA, and the office of the Republican Party of VA respectively. These places are no-brainers!)